by Douglas Lay March 17, 2023
Imagine a “newly revised” Bible translation, built upon a model that ignores the word-for-word vs thought-for-thought dichotomy. This translation overemphasizes the positive, miraculous, amazing, profound, and glorious aspects of the works of God while deleting the opposing, rebellious, disobedient, and sinful responses to God.
For example, the translators keep the ten plagues and the Red Sea miracle but take out the worship of the golden calf in the wilderness. They keep the miracles of God’s provision of manna and water in the desert but delete the Jews complaining about the food, their questioning of Moses’ leadership, and their refusal to listen to the two spies, spending 40 years of discipline in the wilderness.
This translation will proudly speak up about Joshua’s miraculous crossing of the Jordan River and the unique defeat of the city of Jericho, but omit the sin of Achan and the defeat of the city of Ai.
And of course, half of the book of Judges will have to be ripped out—including all of the stories of rebellion, disobedience, and sin that contributed to the multiple cycles in the book--yet the entire story of Ruth will be kept.
The military victories of King Saul will make the cut, but his disobedient rebellion to not attack the entire city of Amalek will not. Saul’s violent and relentless abusive attacks on David’s life and Saul’s inquiry for guidance from the witch from En-dor definitely will not be included in the final edition of this translation.
King David’s victory over Goliath stays; David’s rape and murder go. Solomon’s wisdom and wealth, his building of the Temple, accompanied by a tremendous display of worship will all be celebrated; Solomon’s lust for many women—700 wives and 300 concubines—and his lust for other gods—Ashtoreth, Milcom, Chemosh, Molech—will all be covered-up.
What about the prophetic books? All of God’s promises will be included, yet all of Israel’s rebellions will be excluded. The book of Jeremiah will go from being the longest book in the Bible to one of the shortest. Any mention of God’s judgement, discipline, and correction will not be allowed in this translation—so say goodbye to Amos and Nahum, and 154 of the 164 verses from the book of Lamentations are gone.
But surely all of the New Testament will make the table of contents.
Think again.
The four gospels will experience a major dissection of material, starting with the slaughter of the infants in Bethlehem after Jesus’ birth to the omission of the unlawful, unjust, and evil actions by the Jews and the Romans leading to Jesus’ murder. And do not overlook the relentless attacks and opposition by the Jewish religious leaders against Jesus that preceded Jesus’ trial and crucifixion.
They must all go.
Yet, all of Jesus’ miracles—sixteen physical healings, six castings out of demons, nine miracles over nature, and the three resurrections from the dead—must be included. And do not forget the five miracles done to Jesus—his virgin birth, his baptism, his transfiguration, his resurrection, and his ascension. These stories will be front and center in this “new” Bible.
What about the book of Acts and the Epistles? By now it should be quite obvious what will remain and what will be removed.
Finally, the book of Revelation will be gutted, keeping the last two chapters and a few scattered references to the glory and power of God while all references to judgment, suffering, and destruction will be erased.
This “newly revised” translation should revolutionize the life and future of Christianity. It will be a best seller—overtaking all combined sales of the two most popular English translations, the NIV and the KJV.
How?
Focus on the good; ignore the bad. Celebrate grace; curse the law. Hold on to the promises; let go of the punishments. Expose the power of God; cover up the sins of mankind. Share the good works; stay silent about the evil deeds. Build up the victories while burying the trauma. Excuse the predators; blame the victims.
So, when Christian pastors, missionaries, and educators ignore, deny or cover up financial and sexual scandals for the sake of the reputation of the church and the integrity of Jesus while speaking and writing only about the good they are doing as the “hands and feet” of Jesus, they are actually reading from this “newly revised” translation of the gospel.
They must be reading from the "NEW STIFF-NECKED PEOPLE, UNCIRCUMCISED IN HEART, AND ALWAYS RESISTANT TO THE HOLY SPIRIT VERSION," more commonly known as the NSNPUIHAARTTHSV.
Ask Stephen about it.
He publicly exposed leaders reading from this translation, and they murdered him.
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